What I learned most.....

I have taken a little bit of everything from the information we have learned in class.  This class has made me more aware of subtle effects in a lot of different areas of my communication.  For me, that has been more helpful than having one BIG moment, and far more life changing.  What does strike me the most from what I have learned was probably regarding internal dialogue.  It has made me realize that whatever is going on in my head is noticed by others and they may react from that.  That can also be a domino effect with the social mirror.  If I have stress or issues that are being reflected, my mood can effect the way others feel, think or act.  I always believed that people should control their own mood, but now I see that being part of a positive environment can help people in small, but significant ways as it can change their whole mindset.  I was not aware that I had that much power over others, and that they have that much power over me.  It has encouraged me to be more thoughtful in my approach and what I am presenting.  Thank you!

How Can One Question Change the World?

"We seem to be having a problem between us, but I'd like to find a mutually beneficial situation.  Will you help me?"  It seems pretty simple, and a phrase most would find fairly innocuous and rational.  But, that may be the problem, as conflicts are rarely based in reason.  When having conflict, the ideal situation would be to look at the facts of the situation and both parties sit down and make a reasonable agreement on how to handle it.  Unfortunately, emotions, pride, anger and feelings of entitlement get in the way.  Having a plan in advance that allows you to continually be the resolver in a situation will get you further in life than you would think.  Imagine the power a person could have if, throughout their life, they continually were able to resolve any conflicts with never-ending "tics" in the "win-win" column.  Being able to read people well enough to phrase the communication to achieve desired results is a strength.  But adding the phrase and ultimate question, "We seem to be having a problem between us, but I'd like to find a mutually beneficial situation.  Will you help me?" seems to be the way to ensure that ALL parties are getting the desired result.  And getting both sides to feel as if they have won is a truly powerful gift.

Speech Topic

I have decided to speak on the five stages of grief.  These stages were originally identified by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross in her 1969 book "On Death and Dying".  Originally, these stages were used to describe the feelings of terminally ill or elderly patients when dealing with their own death.  Through the years, this has expanded to include dealing with the death of others and also has gained favor in identifying stages many people go through in far less serious trauma's such as work, health and relationship issues.  These five stages have been revised, challenged, and criticized, but still remain the most recognized theory in the study of bereavement.